And as promised, the news briefs...talked about all week. Weiner's bulge.
Fox News: NEW CASTLE, Del. police are investigating direct online communications between Weiner and a 17-year-old girl and are looking for any other young women who may be involved, though the nature of the communications wasn't immediately clear.
-0-Rewriting Science: RUSH writes off MITT! Mitt Romney thinks there's something to global warming, Rush Limbaugh says Romney's toast for going against the Republican anti-science talking points. Here's the audio of the whole deal... and its clear....RUSH doesn't think much of Romney. (audio from liveleak)
And Mitt writes off the Iowa Caucuses! From his campaign manager: “Our campaign has made the decision to not participate in any straw polls, whether it’s in Florida, Iowa, Michigan or someplace else. This time we will focus our energies and resources on winning primaries and caucuses. What does it mean? Ask Politico's Ben Smith.
Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.
FYI: You can STILL play the Google Gibson Logo Guitar on the web. CLICK HERE!
Don't stress, Check Huffington Post on how to play the Google Gibson Guitar! (use the keyboard but first click the cursor outside the search bar... then use any of the keyboard rows!))
Chicago State's Attorney Lets Bad Cops Slide, Prosecutes Citizens Who Record Them
A German passenger stripped naked on an Iberia flight from Madrid to Frankfurt, forcing the pilot to turn the plane around so the man could be arrested, the Spanish airline said Friday.
"A German passenger took all his clothes off on the plane" Thursday night, an Iberia spokeswoman said. "Staff on board tried to dissuade him, but he became aggressive and finally locked himself in the toilet. The pilot then decided to turn around and land in Madrid."
Jimmy Fallon's Do Not Read list...a fun bit on real books one could read if we wanted to.
- A quarter has 119 grooves on its edge, a dime has one less groove.
- A hummingbird weighs less than a penny. Until 1796, there was a state in the United States called Franklin. Today it is known as Tennessee.
- The flashing warning light on the cylindrical Capitol Records tower spells out HOLLYWOOD in Morse code.
- Every time you lick a stamp, you're consuming 1/10 of a calorie.
- The average person has over 1,460 dreams a year.
The Dead Parrot (For Golfers!)
At dawn the telephone rings, "Hello, Senor Rod? This is Ernesto, the caretaker at your country house."
"Ah yes, Ernesto. What can I do for you? Is there a problem?"
"Um, I am just calling to advise you, Senor Rod, that your parrot, he is dead".
"My parrot? Dead? The one that won the International competition?"
"Si, Senor, that's the one."
"Damn! That's a pity! I spent a small fortune on that bird. What did he die from?"
"From eating the rotten meat, Senor Rod."
"Rotten meat? Who the hell fed him rotten meat?"
"Nobody, Senor. He ate the meat of the dead horse."
"Dead horse? What dead horse?"
"The thoroughbred, Senor Rod."
"My prize thoroughbred is dead?"
"Yes, Senor Rod, he died from all that work pulling the water cart."
"Are you insane? What water cart?"
"The one we used to put out the fire, Senor."
"Good Lord! What fire are you talking about, man?"
"The one at your house, Senor! A candle fell and the curtains caught on fire."
"What the hell? Are you saying that my mansion is destroyed because of a candle?!"
"Yes, Senor Rod."
"But there's electricity at the house! What was the candle for?"
"For the funeral, Senor Rod."
"WHAT BLOODY FUNERAL??!!"
"Your wife's, Senor Rod". She showed up very late one night and I thought she was a thief, so I hit her with your new Ping G15 204g titanium head golf club with the TFC 149D graphite shaft."
SILENCE........... LONG SILENCE.........VERY LONG SILENCE.
"Ernesto, if you broke that driver, you're in deep shit."