Sep 5, 2010

Sure signs the Summer Recovery didn't happen....

  • The economy is so bad that I got a pre-declined credit card in the mail.

  • I ordered a burger at McDonald's, and the kid behind the counter asked,  "Can you afford fries with that?" 

  • CEO's are now playing miniature golf.. 

  • If the bank returns your check marked  "Insufficient Funds," you have to call them and ask if they mean you or them . 

  • Hot Wheels and Matchbox stocks are trading higher than GM. 

  • McDonald's is selling the 1/4  'ouncer'. 

  • Parents in   Beverly Hills and Malibu are firing their nannies and learning their children's names. 

  • A truckload of Americans was caught sneaking into Mexico .
  • Dick Cheney took his stockbroker hunting.
  •  Motel Six won't leave the light on anymore.
  • The Mafia is laying off judges. 

  • BP Oil laid off 25 Congressmen

  • Congress says they are looking into the Bernard Madoff scandal.  Oh Great!!   The guy who made $50 Billion disappear is being investigated by the people who made $1.5 Trillion disappear!
And, finally...

  • I was so depressed last night thinking about the economy, wars, jobs, my savings, Social Security, retirement funds, and our bleak future, that I called the Suicide Lifeline and was connected to a call center in Pakistan .   When I told them I was suicidal, they got all excited, and asked if I could drive a truck.
You don't think they'll cut my ration of birdseed, do you?

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